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Saturday, March 05, 2011

Courtship Durability

Advisably, which one of this is better? short-time relationship before marriage, or long-time relationship before marriage?

Abdron, short-term and long-term means different things to different people. To some, two(2) months is short while to some others, it might be long so I'll say here that it depends on the parties involved and their readiness.

But most authors and some men/women of God advocate for at least six(6)months courtship between intending couples to enable them know each other better, attend counselling sessions and plan towards their marriage.

Some still advocate for a year courtship but prolonging it too much may end up bringing in some vices into the relationship such as lying and pretense. In all, you can still pray to God to give you the go-ahead.

Remain richly blessed..


  1. Thanks for the answer... for me i have plan to marry three years time(2014-2015) but God's will be done, and want 3years courtship, maybe within 12months get to know ourself, and another 12months to agree and wait for God's comfirmation, then for the rest of the months we can start planing for wedding. now my question is this, Is this good or i should count myself immature and wait for another two years before i get one(propose).?

  2. Dear Abdron,
    I like your plan but I think it's a bit upside down. What if God says no after you've known each other very well and already in love?

    I'll suggest that the first step to take if you see a lady you like and admire and would want to call your own is to submit the question to God - is she the one?

    Then after confirmation from God, you can proceed to get to know each other(courtship) after which you can now plan for your wedding.

    Remain richly blessed..

  3. good point, please we will have to expatiate on this topic a bit, for the benefit of those that are in the same shoe with me.
    I do understand that God will not speak to everybody(right or wrong)? or is not every younth out there that will be able to hear God, if true in this case, should they still wait till they hear or what is the alternative.?

  4. Thanks for that wonderfull answer. so i assume now that i've not matured enough, because if now i have intrest in any body and i ask from God for confirmation then. there is no point wasting time, to study or mind her character and behavior. since God has approve. cos He knows everything.
    But another question when God said " then shall a man find wife for him self" what did this have to do in our day's life? God bless you sister.

  5. Thanks for your questions Abdron.
    First of all, God speaks to all His children. Check John 10:27, Psalm 32:8, Prov.3:6 etc. Just as parents talk to their children, God does the same with ALL His children and when you tune in to Him, you'll hear His voice.

    You might not hear Him audibly but the Holy Spirit in us bears a silent witness to that fact that we're God's children and speaks to our heart(sometimes by the peace we feel before and after taking a decision). Also, you can hear God speak mostly through His written Word as you spend more time meditating on It.

    He might not confirm it immediately so we have to wait on Him through diligent and a deliberate searching of the Scriptures and praying, then, in His own time, He'll definitely guide us along the right path.

    Secondly, after God's approval, you still need time to get to know each other because God will not come down to tell you her likes and dislikes, hobby, lifestyle etc. You will have to find those out for yourself during courtship.

    Lastly, your job as a man is to find a wife BUT it's left for God to approve/confirm it. The Bible says "he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord". You can only obtain this favour when God approves the finding.

    Remain richly blessed..

  6. Thabks I'm blessed..............

  7. Thabks I'm blessed..............


I'll Really Love To See Your Contributions/Advice Too, Thanks!